Do you know of someone who struggles to communicate their thoughts and control their emotions? These are examples of low emotional maturity, or more broadly, low psychological maturity. According to the APA Dictionary of psychology, psychological maturity is the ability to effectively deal with the things that come up in life and perform well and biological or social tasks characteristic of a person’s age.
05 Signs that You aren’t Emotionally Mature Details:
Here are five signs of low emotional maturity. Please note that relating to one, two, or even more of these points does not automatically make someone emotionally immature.
1. They can’t Keep their Emotions in Check
According to Heidler, an emotionally immature person can have inappropriate emotional outbursts. This can present in a number of ways, especially in children. For example, a child throws a tantrum upon confrontation. They blame others for their own emotional outbursts, saying things like oh, I acted this way because you made me do it. Do you know someone who’s always driven by their emotions? What about someone like Draco Malfoy from Harry Potter.
2. They’re usually Defensive and Manipulative
It is not uncommon for emotionally immature people to be defensive. When they’re confronted with a problem, they often insult the other person as an intimidation tactic. We want to point out that there is a huge difference between explaining yourself in order to add perspective and defending yourself just to be right and free of blame.
Emotionally immature people are more likely to show defense mechanisms such as projection or denial. As a result, the actions of emotionally immature people may violate other’s boundaries. Has there been a time where you felt that someone violated your boundaries?
3. They Deflect
Let’s explore the term deflection. People who deflect tend to shy away from important conversations. They tend to display a sort of discomfort when talking about anything that requires a large amount of analysis, introspection, or reflection. For example, they tend to bury anything beneath them that could produce negative emotional consequences, choosing to distract themselves from negative emotions rather than working through them.
4. They can be Hostile
Sarna and colleagues found that poor emotional regulation played a role in hostility related to vulnerable narcissism. Do you know if someone who exhibits these characteristics have low psychological maturity?
5. They have a Strong Need for the Presence of Others
Emotionally immature people often feel uncomfortable spending time on their own, perhaps because solitude forces people to be alone with their thoughts and emotions, something that emotionally immature people are not comfortable with. Why might this be spending time with others could serve as a distraction for emotionally immature people to take their minds off of something emotionally taxing they may wish to bury? It takes a sense of emotional maturity to be introspective and to feel your emotions fully.